Tug of War With Your Dog: Safe Rules

One common myth is that letting a dog win at tug makes them dominant. This idea comes from outdated theories about dog behavior and has not held up to scientific scrutiny. Another is that tug teaches dogs to be aggressive. In reality, tug is a form of play that mimics predatory behavior in a safe way. Dogs who play tug with rules typically show better impulse control, not worse.

What matters is how you play. A game with clear start and stop signals, and gentle handling, is safe and fun. A chaotic game, with no rules and a dog who grabs hands and refuses to let go, can get out of hand.

Simple rules make the game safe and predictable for both of you. Teach them gradually, and be consistent.

1. Start only on invitation: your dog must wait until you offer the toy and give a cue, such as take it.
2. Teeth never touch skin. If they do, the game ends immediately and calmly.
3. Drop it means let go: stop the tugging, wait, and trade for a treat or another toy.
4. Take breaks: pause the game regularly, ask for a sit, and then restart.
5. You decide when the game ends: say all done, and put the toy away.
6. Keep the toy in your control when the game is over.

Use a toy designed for tug, long enough that your hands are far from your dog's mouth. Rope toys, braided fleece, and rubber tugs with handles are good options. Avoid toys that can break into pieces, and replace them if they fray. Never use household items, such as old socks or clothing, which can teach your dog to grab things.

Choose a toy that suits your dog's size. A toy that is too small can be swallowed, and one that is too large can be hard to hold. Keep the toy special by using it only for tug, and storing it between sessions.

Keep the toy low, near the dog's chest height, and move it side to side, not up and down. Avoid lifting the dog off the ground, jerking, or twisting, which can injure the neck and spine. Be especially careful with puppies, whose teeth and jaws are developing, and with small or long-backed dogs. Let your dog win sometimes, so the game stays fun.

If your dog is tugging too hard, stop pulling, and let the toy go still. Many dogs let go when the resistance disappears. Then ask for a drop it, reward, and restart if appropriate.

A good drop it is the backbone of safe tug. Start by trading: hold a treat near your dog's nose, and when they release the toy, say drop it and give the treat. Repeat many times, with different toys. Gradually, wait a second longer before you give the treat. Practice at low excitement, then in the middle of a game.

Always reward the drop with something good, including a restart of the game. Dogs who learn that dropping leads to more fun will release faster.

Note: If your dog growls or tenses when you ask them to give up the toy, stop the game and seek advice from a qualified trainer.

Tug is not suitable for every dog or every situation. Avoid it if your dog guards toys and growls or snaps when you approach, or if they cannot control their mouth. Avoid it with puppies who are teething, if their teeth are loose, and with dogs who have neck, back, or dental problems. Talk to your vet if you are unsure.

Do not play tug when your dog is overexcited, or when children are present, unless supervised. Keep the game calm, and end on a positive note.